All of my life I have been plagued with a type of dilemma. Do I or don't I? Don't I or do I? That dilemma of which I speak and have struggled with for so long is... When somebody has something on their face, do I take the liberty of pointing it out to them or let them find it in their own time? After much deliberation I came to the conclusion that the thoughtful thing to do is to speak up. Afterall, who wants to look in the mirror one day and realize you've been walking around all this time, talking to people no less, with THAT on your face?!
Okay, so I pulled up my mental boot straps and prepared myself to fulfil my civic duty. As it turned out, I didn't have to wait long. I saw my opportunity. I gracefully and inconspicuously leaned near the person in need and relayed my message. I revealed to them the embarrassing thing on their face that they were obviously not aware of because, well, it was still on their face. And was I thanked? No! Quite the contrary actually.
At first I thought it might have been an isolated incident. But then it seemed to follow the same trend with each person I helped. Not a one of them was appreciative! Not the woman I discreetly pointed out the unsightly mole, with dark hair sprouting out of it, growing on the side of her cheek. Even though I offered her the number of a dermatologist that does fantastic and painless mole removal. Not the man that I so kindly pointed out that he had stray nose hairs coming out of both nostrils that resembled Kansas tumble weeds. Nor the other woman, when I called her attention to the down right offensive unibrow she was sporting that would have put Frida Kahlo to shame!
Nope, not one speck of gratitude from any of them.
From here on out I consider myself off the hook. I'm officially hanging up my good samaritan smock. Miss Priss can just continue modeling her mustache for all I care and Mr. Fancy Pants can carry on cultivating a briar patch in his ears. May you all, one day, take a closer look in the mirror.